


They were romantics

by halcyonwhispers



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Depression, F/M, Humanstuck, I like pain, Mass Homicide, Mild Gore, Sadstuck, School Bombing, Seriouly, Suicide, Why do I write sad things?, mentions of self harm, of all of teh babies, school shooting, self-hate, why these two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2015-06-21
Packaged: 2018-04-05 12:27:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4179843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halcyonwhispers/pseuds/halcyonwhispers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The moment their eyes met, death was inevitable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	They were romantics

**Author's Note:**

> This story contains horror, suicidal and mass homicidal occurrences along with strong depression and self hate, rated M, but will change rating if anyone has a problem.

_ _She fell from her tower_ _

 

_**  
The After** _

 

There was a thick stench of blood in air. Followed by the whimpering or disembodied gurgles of the students sprawled over the cafeteria floor. 

 

  
Her eyes roamed over the scene with a slight press of her lips together. She sat rather comfortably on a table, legs crossed in uncharacteristic patience, face as empty as that of the dead boy thrown by her feet. The pistol that had been attached to her hip, now laid snuggly in her palm as she turned and calmly pulled the trigger to the forehead of a weeping girl (Feferi? She hadn't been able to see faces except his for a while now) the next table over. The echo rebounded across the large room without effort. 

 

Then there was a scuffle. Quiet, making a squeak really. Without turning her head, her pale green eyes drifted over to the sound and softened at the sight she saw. 

 

The young man's lips twitched at the corner at her and then took several short steps before seating himself next to her. 

 

The cries of the bodies were still apparent as he grabbed ahold of her hand, the one not holding the pistol, and held it delicately. Karkat's black eyes never left her intense gaze. She tucked back a thick lock of his black hair behind his ear. "It's only been 3 minutes." She whispered to him like the lover he was. Like the everything he is. 

 

"3 mintues and," he paused, taking in the number of corpses set before them, "20? 30, dead. Nice. You really good with that. I know I should've been expecting that much badassery from you," He nodded to the automatic rifle strapped over her back then her. He had an angry touch on his eyebrows, and like always, she reached up, brushing away the fury from it.    

 

She withdrew at what he said, flushing with his compliment, the blood filled in her cheeks, granting her an angelic appearance. "Not quite 30," she said looking up at him through lowered lashes.   

 

They had caught all of them off guard as it was mid-day during second lunch. It was so easy, it saddened her a bit. Just put the guns in the back of the car's trunk, and come in. Being the upperclassmen they were, it was simple to go outside unnoticed to gather the things for today. And there were hardly any who spotted them, guns a blazing. 

 

How horribly, undeniably, sad. 

 

They had spent the week prior slipping in the the extra things. But that was for later. In a couple of short minutes. Right now however, all she (he too she was sure) wanted was to enjoy the remaining time before the police showed up. Which could be any second. 

 

Their small town had everything with a 15 minute reach. Normally. 

 

Nepeta nuzzled her head into his neck and breathed in his scent. There was a heavy pressure on them like a wool blanket. She brushed away a piece of glass away from the table where they sat and listened in nagging silence as it fell onto the seat then tumbled down to the floor. 

 

His fingers brushed themselves through her black hair and kissed her forehead. Karkat was always the romantic, hm. That a bit hypocritical. He was no more than she. That's why they planned what was happening later. 

 

She felt him wince when his digits laced through her hair. "You hurt yourself locking the doors..." It wasn't a question, and with his silence came the answer. 

 

They had made sure to keep as many people from leaving as they could. But... She glanced over to where some students had broken the large windows in their vain effort to escape. Their lifeless bodies now laid just outside the building.

 

Jake and Dirk were two she could somehow make out. Just some to name a few. How could she see their faces? Maybe it was because Jake always helped her refill the bird feeders in Nature club after school, and Dirk lent her  _Cats the Musical_ with a quirk of a brow and a softening in his usually blank expression _._  (She think that he might have seen something _)_  


 

The blonde's body was thrown over the broader boy, trying to save him from the impossible. He got shot before Dirk decided to play Prince Charming and push himself in front of Jake, only to result in the same fate. 

 

How heartwarming. 

 

  
_They should've ran faster if they though they could make it,_  she thought then with a slight irritated frown. 

 

As if reading her mind, he muttered low in her ear, half offended, half a chuckle."Nepeta, come on. You know I'm a good shot. I was better at shooting than they were with running." She pressed her lips to his neck tenderly. Her hands went to touch his hair but paused at the two identical guns on his back, some kind of automatic wepon, faster than her own to fire. There was a handgun at his thigh, just in case. 

 

"I thought those soccer guys were going to get you." 

 

"Of course not. No. I'm a better shot," he repeated, confident and so unsure of his words. 

 

Again, there was a bit where neither of them spoke. Then there was a distance sound. So far away though. "Been 5 minutes," she told him. 

 

They held hands, stood up, there was a sharp crunching sound of glass, before he flipped a switch on a box connected to his belt. A soft tender melody filled the loudspeakers. They held each other when he flipped another switch. 

 

_BAM!BAM!BAM!BAM!_

 

8 piercing explosion flew from the surrounding school buildings as she closed her eyes and rested her head on his chest. 

 

They were both hopeless romantics. 

 

There were screams and wails of terror combined with the crumbling and tearing away of the school itself. The school was separated into five building, including the cafeteria, where they now stood. So they divided the bombs, two to each building. With the exception of the eating area- here. She supposed it was because they had already caused enough change in this one place. No need for more. 

 

The melody over the speaker lulled on softly. 

 

She could hear that sound now. Sirens. 

 

"It's almost over. Dang. Can you believe it? After months of planning?" he spoke quietly with a hint of disbelief in his voice. 

 

"Yeah... And all under 10 mintues." She finally pulled away and looked up at the love of her life. Another lonely soul, if only they met earlier in life. 

 

If. 

 

"Got the letter?" She smiled, grinned really, to him. 

 

He patted his jean's pocket. "You?" She gestured to her breast pocket. 

 

"By my heart, baby." And giggled (real) at the slight wrinkle of his nose, faking disgust at her lovey dovey-ness. 

 

The song was almost drowned out by the screams and yells coming from beyond the cafe. There was a faint smell of smoke in the air. Most likely from the chemistry labs located farthest away. She wondered if the police would come on time to put out the fire before that could do much damage. 

 

He turned up the music via the magic box on his belt. 

 

He slipped out the gun from his thigh holster and held it up to his head. She mimicked the movement with her pistol. The sirens were just around the corner. 

 

"Forever?" he whispered. 

 

"And ever," she replied. 

 

They grinned, his more of a soft smirk, and pulled the trigger together. 

 

Both were dead before they hit the ground. 

 

 

 

 

 

_**The Before** _

 

 

She knew she was broken long before others could come to that realization. 

 

Everything in her life was normal enough. Maybe that was the problem all along. There was such a sweet tender sadness (lonely, oh how lonely she was) inside she could fall into for days. But still in the end, she came out with a smiling face. She was just the giddy girl who loved cats and shipping. She laughed. Laughed. Cheered. Giggled. She appeared ignorant. 

 

Nepeta never told anyone. Why? Simply because there really wasn't anyone to tell too. The few friends she had were distant and far off. Like an interesting- or rather - boring place. 

 

Even Equius couldn't see her loneliness. She was too busy hoping the sadness away while she was with her best friend. 

 

But she wasn't going to lie to herself. She was so goddamn  _lonely_. The ache inside burned. 

 

Burned. 

 

Then one day she suddenly came upon the thought. 

 

It would never change. And here she would stay, forever and ever. 

 

Forever and ever. 

 

Those tiny three words petrified her. That one thought could cause agonizing pain. 

 

But she met him. 

 

He was just as damaged, just as terrified, just as desperate as her.  He changed everything for her. Well- she supposed- just as much as she changed everything for him. 

 

She met him in the rain. 

 

She was walking down downtown. The town square to be exact. It was a Tuesday, summer, and pouring. It was no surprise the place was deserted of people. She had crossed the street, umbrella in hand, trying to reach her mother in the only store opened at the time. She was sure her mother was the last person the beauty salon had inside. 

 

She hurried to the other side and saw a person standing under the safety of a building's sunscreen. He was holding a piece of paper in his hand. A jacket framed his lackey body. Locks of wet black hair stuck to his face, making it look like strings of ink has spilled over his white face. Mouth twisted in distaste, probably over the rain. It wasn't until he ran a hand through the wet locks did she see that the black ink seemed to pool in his eyes, for they were so black. That was her inner self being creative over seeing the most beautiful person (inside and out, she knew this) she had ever met. Nepeta could tell that even from the many feet that even from where she stood. 

 

But nevertheless, she only clutched the umbrella harder, held her embarrassed gaze down and walked faster. Heart pulsing like never before in her chest. It was like it just just started to beat. 

 

She had to pass him to get to her mother. 

 

Then, just as she moved in front of him, his voice trapped her. 

 

"Hey, you." That started it all. He had wanted directions. She told him. He had the slightest indentions at his forehead, speaking how often he frowned. They were weak and almost invisible now, glossed over in an unpracticed smiled. It was crooked. 

 

She felt chilled to the bone. And it wasn't because of the oddly freezing rain the summer. 

 

She had seen smile many times. In the mirror.

 

(Unadulterated self loathing _. You aren't good enough you can't do anything right can you. Everything aimed at himself. Like it was for her when she saw the reflection she loathed to see in the bathroom_ ) 

 

So she ran. 

 

But, then again, when school started back up again, she approached him, drawn like a moth to those fancy bug zappers, entranced for some unknown reason. Death was inevitable. 

 

Nepeta made up an excuse to be near him. He needed a friend, or so she said. Karkat was new to the school, and she could tell he struggled to tell her that he wasn't interested in making friends. 

 

The point that it was hard for him to tell her so, when he spat insults and hissed curses at anyone who came near, meant the world to her. 

 

He was captured by her just as much as she was. However, everything he was disgusted with (himself) kept anything from happening. It was the same for her. The exact same. 

 

She kept the same smile (that one, the lie, the hate, the pain) though. 

 

One day he asked her something, the same day she couldn't take Equius' worried looks and Terezi's smirk covering the stitching of her brows, and took refuge under the trees, away from the presence of her peers. 

 

The question was sudden. "Hey, you. This is my spot." He came from behind. She hadn't spoken to him in some weeks. 

 

Even he couldn't stand her. The thought made her heart bleed. 

 

Then curiously enough, he stared, features relaxing a slim at seeing her.  Then those black, black eyes bore into her soul, seeing the thing no one else had ever bothered to find. Not her mother, spending most of her days documenting the teachings of the town new pastor, not her beautiful, damaged sister, bleeding herself from the love she claimed in that mute. 

 

Yet he saw it.  _Saw_. 

 

Her void. It matched his own. Nepeta gazed into his, darkness and hate, hate, hate everyone, hate for himself even more. Hate. 

 

He tugged down on the black long sleeved turtleneck he always wore, pulled down the sleeve even more down his wrist. She saw the tally marks, each leaving impressions of how much everything was so hard, too hard, and if he didn't care, why would anyone. 

 

They looked like the ones she had on the inside of her thigh. The ones she made to remember how much it hurt. It distracted her; the pain. It blinded her a little against the hole breaking her heart in two. It masked the loneliness a little. 

 

So, how could she leave him, just as all those have left her? (They never were there to start with) So she stayed. 

 

"Hello."

 

He was just as demented as her. She loved him. 

 

Over a amazingly short course of two months, the two were inseparable.  Yet, the loneliness also manifested. How strange. The hate and pain the two had, it consumed the other, gaining, and suffering, to a new max neither of them had ever experienced. 

 

His fingers gripped her hair with incredible strength and she sucked in a breath. The kiss was agonizingly slow and painful. But it was life changing. It was life. 

 

By the time their tears came streaming down, their clothes were already thrown across the room. Their breaths and screams joined, hands touched and explored, nail bite into virgin flesh, and when it was done, again they cried. Because it was so clear what they had to do. Because how much they hated.  Because how much they loved. 

 

"I would give anything... Anything to keep you," he gasped against her stomach. His arms tightened their hold on her waist. "I love you. Forever and ever."

 

Then those three words didn't seem so bad. 

 

So, in the end, when she fired the first shot, she laughed. She had good aim. It all worked out. 

 

It all worked out. 

**Author's Note:**

> First homestuck fic ever written. Dark elements in the story written to try to understand something. Then nepeta's feelings and overall characterization based on the update some back. "The cat girl who ships to try to forget how lonely she is," or something like that. Sorry if anyone is OOC, tried to see how they would be in this situation with these types emotions. 
> 
> Never thought what those letters said, maybe they finally told their truth for people to listen. Maybe they wrote fuck off and I hated you all. Or maybe, they wrote the lyrics to each song they both used to listen to to forget the world and find peace. I don't know. You pick. 
> 
> I listened to With Ears to see and Eyes to hear by Sleeping with Sirens on repeat when writing this. Go check it.


End file.
